I had an appointment to see my Oncologist yesterday to discuss my treatment. I went for a body scan two weeks ago. I was very nervous about this appointment in case more cancer had been spotted on the scan. I was told that as far as they could see the scan was clear. I was very relieved. I asked if stopping the chemotherapy after nine sessions would effect the chances of the cancer not being stopped. Apparently I had as much chemo as they can give anybody in all the sessions and my oncologist was in no doubt that I had received more than adequate to kill most cancer cells. He went on to say that because the dose was high this had probably damaged nerves in my feet and this is why I had constant numbness and pain in them. The nerves may mend or it could be something that remains damaged and becomes part of my life. If I have a life, then to me this is a small price to pay. He tells me that I am finished in the unit and he will hopefully not see me again. I have mixed feelings about being dismissed from the chemotherapy unit. I am obviously very very pleased that I will not have to have the horrible chemotherapy any more and all the illness associated with it. I suddenly feel very isolated and alone. T_he primrose cancer unit at Bedford hospital is a wonderful caring supportive unit to attend when you are terrified of this awful illness. The unit is attached to the main hospital but it even has it's own entrance which makes you feel you are not attending the normal everyday wards of a hospital. When you walk in to the reception for your first appointment you are surprised at how courteous and kind the staff are, making your day feel better from the start. You sit in the waiting area, with a friend if you like amongst other people waiting for chemotherapy sessions. It is not long before a wonderful volunteer comes round and asks if you would like a drink ,coffee, tea, squash or water. Very soon a nurse appears, calls your name and takes you towards the unit. On your way he or she introduces themselves and tells you that they will be looking after you today. You go inside the unit and I expected to see a line of beds as in other wards. There are easy chairs dotted around the room and small tables and you are invited to sit where you like. Some people are already there attached to pipes going into their arms. There is facility for about twenty people at a time to receive chemotherapy. I see there are four beds as well in case some people prefer to lie down and perhaps doze, I sat, that way I didn't feel ill. There are nurses, about six or seven attending to the patients, changing bottles on the stands, attaching drips to arms etc. Some patients are reading, some talking to each other or sleeping. Nearly all the patients were happy to be there and being treated. Some patients brought in cakes they had made to share with the patients and staff. Apart from the effects of the chemotherapy I received on these days I looked forward to being there. These patients were so happy to be alive and enjoyed every moment they could. The nurses were extremely special. They had volunteered to be here and were a special kind of person. All the nurses were very considerate and worked hard to make the cancer patients feel as comfortable and happy as possible. I have never been in a hospital building where there has been so much laughter between staff and patients. I will always be so grateful to these caring people.
Well this was now stopping, so I will not only miss the unit and staff but also the fact that I was being monitored and looked after so closely. Have to remain positive now, although at the moment it is a bit like jumping off into the unknown.
Well this was now stopping, so I will not only miss the unit and staff but also the fact that I was being monitored and looked after so closely. Have to remain positive now, although at the moment it is a bit like jumping off into the unknown.